Q: Is it true that hell plays whiny Neil Young 24 hours a day?
A: Yes, but hell doesn't keep track of time.
Q: What's the most popular attraction in heaven?
A: Billy Graham mudwrestling with Emmeline Pankhurst, two shows a day. Unlike the fallen angel in charge of hell, God keeps time, best three out of four takedowns in 10 minutes. Billy has never won a match and he grumbles about wearing hot pink lycra.
Q: Why is Bruce Springsteen called The Boss?
A: Well, you certainly couldn't call him a vocalist.
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